5 May, 2022
“Global emotional intelligence trends looked good from 2017 to 2019… and then 2020 happened.”
Many of you may still be recovering from the 2020 burnout and just when you thought it would have been over in a couple months, the anxiety, fear, loneliness and sudden stress of adaptability, dragged on into 2020… Part II (aka 2021). For most, it felt like this matrix of change was both unanticipated and unprecedented.
It’s often said that you “can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps,” meaning the pursuit of any new or unfamiliar situation sometimes requires a big leap. For certain, the organizational change experienced by employers and employees alike, as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic, has proved exactly that. The difference in this situation is that the leap was inescapable. But what about the emotional change? The emotional leap?
In your imagination such a leap might sound daring, inspiring even, but the reality is that for a great number of professionals, it has been a far cry from that image. Not everyone is sufficiently or even tolerably emotionally intelligent to handle these changes. And that’s okay. You had little time to assess, predict or adapt to the risks involved with such a leap.
On the positive side, however, persons found themselves crossing the technological hurdle quite easily, whilst others (mostly from a different generation) caught on impressively quickly and gained confidence doing something they may have thought daunting pre-pandemic. That was the easy part. The flip side, the psychological and emotional side, exposed the looming feelings of hopelessness, of being trapped on the cusp of “all hell breaking loose” and sometimes drowning in the virtual abyss.
But why is that? And how do you then overcome those challenges confidently? Here are six clear-cut ways in which to increase your EQ and build your confidence in an already challenging work environment.
- Recognize, Understand, Take Action – #SelfAwareness
Emotional Intelligence is based on four pivotal quadrants. The first one being Self-Awareness, which encourages critical self-reflection. It’s a fact that not every day will be a happy or productive one, because, well, life happens – the pandemic keeps reiterating that point again and again. Now more than ever, people feel unmotivated, scared, isolated or worst, insufficient.
Many mirror what is called ‘impostor syndrome’ and suffer silently in self-doubt. It is therefore mandatory to be aware of these feelings and thoughts, to recognize them, accept them for what they are, understand they are mostly caused by isolated incidents and do not define your entire existence. The next step is to make sense of them and take affirmative action to cope and overcome.
Self-confidence is directly correlated with self-awareness and is gravely affect by it. This is important for managers and employees alike, as the effects are a two-way street. In employees, a lack of confidence may result in low productivity, whilst overconfidence may lead to the inability to be teachable, improve skills or receive constructive criticism. In managers the former can foster an attitude of accepting or producing mediocre work, whilst the latter creates a lack of proper leadership, room for growth and innovation – much to the detriment of the company’s goals. It is easy to identify the challenges with the ‘new’ norm of work life, hence, it must be equally simple to identify your moods, behaviours and impulses; when and why they are being felt.
The next step is, action… towards dispelling managing them as quickly as possible, focusing on your small wins and successes that contribute to the bigger picture.
- Ready, Steady, Go Seize Opportunities – #SelfManagement
You got this. Now say it out loud: “I got this!” Self-Control takes practise and as Peter Sage aptly puts it: Humans are “creatures of habit.” No one would ever love you more than you love yourself – and quite frankly, why would you expect them to? This is more of a call-to-action than it is a statement. Self-love is akin to self-care. Mental health matters, physical wellbeing is important. Self-Management involves dropping off your old habits of negative self-talk and quieting the disruptive voice in your head.
Holding yourself accountable leads to an attitude of integrity, managing responsibilities, adapting to changing situations, overcoming obstacles with objectivity and clarity, achieving internal goals, taking initiative and being willing and ready to seize the opportunities that may not always be available.
“Your nervous system may be hard-wired for comfort but the true essence of who you are and what make you, ‘you’ (your soul) is hard-wired for growth.”
It is crucial to bet on and not against yourself and one of the best ways to give yourself more of an advantage is to learn, learn every day and learn more – then apply that knowledge, build on it and share it. It is in sharing that you learn more. Understand who you are, the value you give and receive when you actively show up for yourself.
- No One Is An Island – #SocialAwareness
You looked inward for a reason and while self-awareness allowed you to learn about and understand yourself, social awareness requires looking outward to learn about and appreciate others. Social awareness focuses on recognizing and understanding others’ feelings.
But how does that build my confidence?, you may ask. Well the answer is simple. Social awareness affords you the ability and tangibility of ‘living in the moment’, of decluttering your mind – which teaches you the importance of active listening, teamwork, improvement of relationships and the beauty/appreciation of differing perspectives.
Social Awareness makes for empathetic leaders and employees and as Coleman and Ekman asserts, underscores the 3 types of empathy: cognitive, emotional and compassionate. The first allows you to recognize and understand your colleagues thoughts and feelings and have it reciprocated. This way, messages are conveyed in ways that truly and effectively reaches the other person. The second allows you to connect with your peers on a more in-depth and personal level because everyone goes through challenging situations. Compassionate empathy allows you to show up for someone, or them for you, in times of personal crises and loss and reminds you that you are not alone in the challenges you face. It allows for mutual respect and understanding of human experiences.
- You Are Not Alone – #Mindfulness & #Wellbeing
You’ve already endured almost 2 years of borderline solitary confinement. Your self-esteem was taxed to zero and you’re either back in office or adapting to hybrid work. If you’re an employer or manager, it’s a given that this is not a one-man show and if you’re an employee, you’ve been forced to adapt to new ways of achieving goals, communication and teamwork. You are your company’s most valued resource (human resource) and you are vital to the continuity and success of that company.
The real question here is what has your company done in preparation for your full or rostered return and for your emotional intelligence? What has the conversation and general tone of the office been like? What are your leaders saying doing about the inevitable change? Many companies have come the realization that it cannot be ‘business as usual.’
There is a lot to be learned from Aegis Business Solutions for example, who, in June of this year, embarked on a ‘Mindfulness and Wellbeing’ training for their staff. They understood that the emotional and mental welfare of their staff, matters.
Through Harvard-trained Life Coach, Selwyn Bhajan’s guidance, Aegis continues to further develop three key areas with staff:
- To introduce a brain-based leadership culture. Here, Aegis leaders are learning to fully develop their brain capacity in tandem with adopting traditional leadership skills
- Staff training sessions include learning to be more aware of themselves: more mindfully alert, more emotionally intelligent, learning to understand how to manage stress and address challenges.
- Training group sessions or ‘champions’ to further teach passionate individuals how to be Mindfulness Instructors to ensure continuity throughout the organization
- It Takes a Village – #RelationshipManagement
One of the major elements of Emotional Intelligence and by extension, confidence, is the relationships you build and maintain with others. Confidence is enhanced through various aspects of relationship management and calls for vision, guidance, development, support, feedback, influence, adopting persuasive strategies, well-tuned messages, conflict management and resolution, teamwork, collaboration and cooperation.
All of these boils down to your optimism. Did you know that optimism is a learnable, teachable and measurable skill, which allows you to see the risks as well as the possibilities and opportunities for growth and positive change. Optimism is the driver behind Relationship Management. When you are made to feel secure, heard and seen in your role, your optimism level increases. Now, this does not mean that the onus is on someone else to bring forth that feeling but once fostered, half the battle is won.
Relationship Management paired with optimism and a collaborative effort towards mutual well-being ensures job effectiveness, healthy work-life balance, stronger work relationships, improved well-being and quality of life.
- You Owe It To Yourself – #ExpandYourSkillset
One of the best ways to adopt and maintain confidence is to keep adding tools to your professional and personal toolkit, however, having tools alone is not enough to maximize your potential or results for that matter. As the adage goes, it’s no use being a jack of all trades and master of none. All this to say that the knowledge can only take you thus far. It is imperative that such knowledge is bolstered by practical know-how, especially in the Caribbean’s changing economic landscape.
The change has come, it has been happening but are you confident enough to keep riding those ever-evolving waves of change?
Being able to do so requires the development of emotional intelligence for the workplace, a pragmatic approach to “communicating confidently, delaying gratification, managing change well, creatively solving problems, and establishing rapport in chaotic situations.”
All things being EQual, your high emotional intelligence should boost your confidence and enlarge your career path.